An Egg

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5 min

It was a car accident. Nothing particularly remarkable, but fatal nonetheless. You left behind a wife and two children. It was a painless death. The EMTs tried their best to save you, but to no avail. Your body was so utterly shattered you were better off, trust me.

And that’s when you met me.

“What… what happened?” You asked. “Where am I?”

“You died,” I said, matter-of-factly. No point mincing words.

“There was a…a truck and it was skidding…”

“Yup.” I said

“I… I died?”

“Yup. But don’t feel bad about it. Everyone dies.” I said.

You looked around. There was nothingness. Just you and me. “What is this place?” You asked. “Is this the afterlife?”

“More or less,” I said.

“Are you god?” You asked.

“Yup.” I replied. “I’m God.”

“My kids… my wife,” you said.

“What about them?”

“Will they be alright?”

“That what I like to see,” I said. “You just died and your main concern is for your family. That’s good stuff right there.”

You looked at me with fascination. To you, I didn’t look like God. I just looked like some man. Some vague authority figure. More of a grammar school teacher than the almighty.

“Don’t worry,” I said. “They’ll be fine. Your kids will remember you as perfect in every way. They didn’t have time to grow contempt for you. Your wife will cry on the outside, but will be secretly relieved. To be fair, your marriage was falling apart. If it’s any consolation, she’ll feel very guilty for feeling relieved.”

“Oh,” you said. “So what happens now? Do I go to heaven or hell or something?”

“Neither,” I said. “You’ll be reincarnated.”

“Ah,” you said. “So the Hindus were right.”

“All the religions are right in their own way,” I said. “Walk with me.”

You followed along as we strolled in the void. “Where are we going?” “Nowhere in particular,” I said. “It’s just nice to walk while we talk.”

“So what’s the point, then?” You asked. “When I get reborn, I’ll just be a blank slate, right? A baby. So all my experiences and everything I did in this life won’t matter.”

“Not so!” I said. “You have within you all the knowledge and experiences of all your past lives. You just don’t remember them right now.”

I stopped walking and took you by the shoulders. “Your soul is more magnificent, beautiful, and gigantic than you can possibly imagine. A human mind can only contain a tiny fraction of what you are. It’s like sticking your finger in a glass of water to see if it’s hot or cold. You put a tiny part or yourself into the vessel, and when you bring it back out, you’ve gained all the experiences it had.”

“You’ve been a human for the last 34 years, so you haven’t stretched out yet and felt the rest of your immense consciousness. If we hung out here for longer, you’d start remembering everything. But there’s no point doing that between each life.”

“How many times have I been reincarnated, then?”

“Oh, lots. Lots and lots. And into lots of different lives.” I said. “This time around you’ll be a Chinese peasant girl in 540 A.D.”

“Wait, what?” You stammered. “You’re sending me back in time?”

“Well, I guess technically. Time, as you know it, only exists in your universe. Things are different where I come from.”

“Where do you come from?” You pondered.

“Oh sure!” I explained. “I come from somewhere. somewhere else. and there are others like me. I know you’ll want to know what it’s like there but you honestly won’t understand.”

“Oh.” you said, a little let down. “But wait. If i get reincarnated to other places in time, could I have interacted with myself at some point?”

“Sure. Happens all the time. And with both lives only aware of their own timespan you don’t even know it’s happening.”

“So what’s the point of it all?”

“Seriously?” I asked. “Seriously? Your asking me for the meaning of life? Isn’t that a little stereotypical?”

“Well it’s a reasonable question.” you persisted.

I looked in your eye. “The meaning of life, the reason I made this whole universe, is for you to mature.”

“You mean mankind? You want us to mature?”

“No. just you. I made this whole universe for you. With each new life you grow and mature, and become a larger and greater intellect” “Just me? What about everyone else?”

“There is no one else,” I said. “In this universe, there’s just you, and me.”

You stared blankly at me. “But all the people on earth…”

“All you. Different incarnations of you.”

“Wait. I’m everyone!?”

“Now you’re getting it.” I said, with a congratulatory slap on the back.

“I’m every human who ever lived?”

“Or who will ever live, yes.”

“I’m Abraham Lincoln?”

“And you’re John Wilkes Booth, too.” I added.

“I’m Hitler?” you said, appalled.

“And you’re the millions he killed.”

“I’m Jesus?”

“And you’re everyone who followed him.”

You fell silent.

“Every time you victimized someone,” I said, “You were victimizing yourself. Every act of kindness you’ve done, you’ve done to yourself. Every happy and sad moment ever experienced by any human was, or will be, experienced by you.”

“Why?” You asked me. “Why do all this?”

“Because someday, you will become like me. Because that’s what you are. You’re one of my kind. You’re my child.”

“Whoa.” you said, incredulous. “You mean I’m a god?”

“No. Not yet. You’re a fetus. You’re still growing. Once you’ve lived every human life throughout all time, you will have grown enough to be born.”

“So the whole universe,” you said. “It’s just…”

“An egg of sorts.” I answered. “Now its time for you to move on to your next life.”

And with that, I sent you on your way.

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A Gay Worm
A Gay Worm
5 years ago

I am Minded Fucked so hard..But please next time use a condom if you don’t mind Me. Thanks. ;>

Jim_theobverser
Jim_theobverser
5 years ago

Well Great Job Me! :> You have now fucked us my View of life! Anyways Me I mean Us has to go talk to our Best friend about stuff Kay bue me!

I
iamlegend
5 years ago

you must do more of these

VerySpoopyCat avatar
VerySpoopyCat
5 years ago

An Egg!!!

xXcassidyXx avatar
xXcassidyXx
5 years ago

[spoiler][/spoiler]sounds kinda like the movie matrix

GriffFromDiscord avatar
GriffFromDiscord
5 years ago

deep af, this should be in a book. someone should make a comic about this.

SuaveBuckwild avatar
SuaveBuckwild
6 years ago

This made me think “Is this true!?”

DarKnight avatar
DarKnight
6 years ago

Wow…..

N
nanuk0429
6 years ago

this is a copy, and its not even a pasta. I’ve seen this on many different philosophical websites. It is called The Egg, by Andy Weir. Here is a link to the original story. http://galactanet.com/oneoff/theegg_mod.html

OxiSabbath avatar
OxiSabbath
6 years ago

Interesting!

Chaseti127 avatar
Chaseti127
6 years ago

4 1/2 yummy pasta

jessica
jessica
6 years ago

this isnt the oringal post this was written by another person and ended up here

BinaryStalemate avatar
BinaryStalemate
6 years ago

This pasta is absolutely perfect 5/5!

S
samstylle
6 years ago

the worst story I’ve ever heard Don’t waste your time, just warning.

UnknownDeviant avatar
UnknownDeviant
6 years ago

I was actually thinking about the concept of this story waaaaaaay before I have read this. And frankly speaking, we really can’t say if this speaks the truth or not. But kudos to the writer! Great imagination! Thank you for creating a story for a theory that I wanted to put into words for a very long time. 5 STARS!

thethingunderthebed avatar

holy shiiiiit whaaaaaat
i was everyone

cjblack
cjblack
6 years ago

now THISH is a great story … thank you very much, sir. I had a friend of mine call me from Arkansas she said this is a crazy shtory…

Adam Allo
Adam Allo
6 years ago

LOGIC – EVERYBODY. YEAAAH BOIII

Omfi avatar
Omfi
6 years ago

So I wrote this story.

VeiledDragon avatar
VeiledDragon
6 years ago

Next time you fuck my brain use a condom