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4 min read

You are in a Room

Author since 2013 5Stories 0 Followers
You are in a Room

“Wake up! Wake up!”

Your brain is trying to jolt you awake. However meek and disturbing your dream was, does not compare to what you will see when you wake.

You wake up in a room. This room is draped in a thick layer of darkness. The only light, though dim, comes from a vertical window. The light tries to cut through the shadow, but only illuminates a tiny portion of the room. You breathe in a slow breath, the smell of rusty metal fills your nostrils. You start to cough violently at this point, both from the air and also from your escalating fear.

You don’t know how you got here and you don’t seem to care. You scream bloody murder for your salvation, but you know salvation will never come. You frantically try to find a way to escape, but the binds that restrict your wrists and your ankles prevent any progress. No amount of strength will release the screws that bolt the chair to the floor.

You are in a room. You’re eyes start to adjust to the dark as you start to see shapes fluttering on the ceiling and the dark corners of the room. You may continue to look toward the light that trickles into the room, but be wary since the sun is starting to set.

You see some movement at the corner of your eye. “What could it be?”. Sweat starts to trickle down your face as you try to follow the shadowy figure. You grow more and more frantic and start to stumble on your words.

“Hello…Hello! Who are you? Can you please…please help me? I don’t know why I’m here. What do they want from me? Hello! Are you listening to me? Please help me whoever you are!” But it doesn’t seem to matter, the shadowy figure does not seem to even notice you. It just sits in the dark corner across from you. You feel your heart beat continue to pound more and more. You feel the pressure on your breathing as you start to gasp for air. Tears start to fall onto your face, melding with the sweat. The drowning amount of water escapes your face and falls onto the floor, forming massive puddles. But even those puddles can’t escape your fate.

The shadowy figure seems to take notice at your pleas. It seems that whoever this is is coming closer and closer. You don’t know whether or not this shadow is your salvation, or your doom. The face of the roommate is blocked out from the encroaching darkness as the sun dips closer and closer behind the horizon. You continue to gaze upon the roommate, waiting for it to do something. However, you fail to notice that the sun is almost completely gone. Even the Sun needed to escape, it needed to find salvation from beyond the horizon. But the Sun has pushed you into the darkness.

You keep gazing at the roommate as the last fleeting sun rays jump off the cold floor and out the window to the dilapidated space. Suddenly, the roommate stops a few feet away from you and your chair. His head gives the impression that he’s looking up and down you. You feel your heart beat ever faster and faster, as if it will burst out of your chest at any minute. You feel the sweat and tears dripping off your chin in buckets. You feel the darkness hold you into its cold grasp. The last thing you see before the room becomes completely dark is the roommate, standing ever presently in the same place.

You are in a room, a pitch black room. You look around, trying to find some sort of light, but you can’t find any. All of the sudden, you feel two sets of long fingers grasp you on the backs of your shoulders.

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mr potato
mr potato
5 years ago

THEN WHO WAS PHONE?!!!!????

P
PoisonVanquish
6 years ago

Was it E.T

PolarBear avatar
Zymeer
6 years ago

This is the absolute worst pasta I have ever read [spoiler]0/1000[/spoiler]

PolarBear avatar
Zymeer
6 years ago

This is the[spoiler] worst [/spoiler] pasta I have ever read [spoiler]0/100[/spoiler]

X

I wasn’t planning on sleeping anyway…

GrimmBullet avatar
GrimmBullet
7 years ago

I agree with @tawny Laine. Also, near the end you spammed “the roomate”.

Creepythepasta avatar
Creepythepasta
8 years ago

Honestly I think the fact that I’m already rather scared of the dark added to the fact that this pasta kinda scared me a little. I think if you weren’t scared of the dark it wouldn’t have the same effect. Either way, 3/5 not too bad

J
Jrhend84
8 years ago

Predictable and anti-climactic

GoldenWolve01 avatar
GoldenWolve01
8 years ago

This was a pretty good story i will give it a 4/5… But overall it is a great and chill thrilling story. It also made me think and get really concerned. How did i get in this room? Who is this mysteries person? And why am i here with this person that I don’t even know?

VinnyVeezel avatar
VinnyVeezel
8 years ago

“you are in a room, a pitch black room. You look around, trying to find some sort of light, but you can’t find any. All of the sudden, you feel two sets of long fingers grasp you on the backs of your shoulders.” never seen that before

Anonymous
Anonymous
8 years ago

A couple of things:

-“meek” is not used correctly, making the first part of the piece off-putting.
-Fear doesn’t make you cough…
-The description is thrown together in a way that seems kind of childish; could use revision.

Other than that, good pasta. 3/5

DANNYSTRIKEFORCE11 avatar
DANNYSTRIKEFORCE11
8 years ago

was ok 15/25

NightmareAnimatronic avatar

I Think It Is A Little Too Short And Needs A Little More Effort, But Otherwise I Think This Is A Very Original Creepeypasta And I Think You Did A Pretty Good Job For The Most Part. 😀

Greg avatar
Greg
8 years ago

Sorry, I didn’t get that one.

WolfEcho avatar
WolfEcho
8 years ago

Creepy, not scary. Sorry.

TheInsanePerson avatar
TheInsanePerson
9 years ago

I hope he isn’t going through some things… If you know what I mean *wink wink* *hint hint* *nudge nudge* anyone?

D
Discopie
9 years ago

Holy crap, that creeped me out and sent things crawling up my spine. Good pasta but maybe just a little more creepy details like noises or things.

tawnilaine avatar
tawnilaine
9 years ago

All I can focus on in this story is that the author said “all of the sudden.” It’s a sudden, not the. That is my biggest pet peeve in the grammar world.

pinchers81 avatar
pinchers81
9 years ago

I don’t seem to care how I got here.

S
small
9 years ago

is there more to this???