It was the normal routine for me- wake up, get ready, work for hours, go home, eat, and sleep. By ‘normal routine,’ I mean ‘painfully repetitive routine.’
I’ve been walking home from work lately, mostly because my car needs to get fixed and partly because I didn’t want to have to pay for a cab, I have a low paying job and I live by myself since my parents have been dead for a few months, forcing me to quit college so I could pay the bills. However, this night feels….. off, somehow. It’s like someone is following me, but maybe the person behind me is just going in the same direction.
Curious, I took out my phone, not to make a call or text anyone, but to look at the reflection of the person behind me. Of course, I couldn’t see much, it was dark and cell phone screen reflections aren’t really the best. What I saw was a slender figure wearing a long trench coat and- huh?
The person behind me, most likely a woman, her face had been shaded by the darkness, but after passing a street light, I could see her smile widely. Her eyes and cheekbones were sunken, and her lips were… were they… rotting?! Yes, I could see clearly that the skin around her lips were dark and reddened, like they were scraped severely, but in this case, it was decaying. I put away my phone as quickly as possible.
“Yooouung man……” a piercing, guttural voice emanated from the… thing behind me, causing me to involuntarily stop, as my knees started shaking violently just from looking at their face. I couldn’t help but slowly turn my head to see ‘it’ practically stagger towards me. It opened its eyes widely, making it obvious that its eyes were bloodshot. “Giiive mmeee yyour SKIN. New host fforrr thisss parasite.”
I couldn’t move my feet, no matter how much I tried, it was like something was holding me down. I looked down, and around my ankles, just what was it?! It looked like thick strands of flesh or something, jutting out of cracks on the sidewalk.
The thing’s eyes popped out of the sockets, and its mouth dropped open, revealing rotting teeth. The trench coat fell from the woman’s shoulder, which was apparently the only article of clothing she had. Out of nowhere, a skinless hand ripped open her stomach, and made the gash larger and larger until the thing crawled out of the body.
I was about ready to throw up at that point. I couldn’t move. I couldn’t breathe.
The thing- that parasite, was slouched over, it had eyes, but they had no irises and pupils. It had no skin, it was all made up of muscle, and it was staggering to me, raising its clawed hand with a disgusting smile. “Skin. Skin. Skin. Skin. SKIN. SKIN. SKIN. SKIN. SKIN. SKIN. SKIN. IIIIT’S MINE.”
I couldn’t even scream as it cut open my stomach.
It wasn’t long after that, that I was dead. Every muscle, every bone, every organ, every vain and artery was ripped out, and it made its way inside me and stitched up the cut from the inside.
wow
couldve been streched a bit, maybe him being trapped in his house or something, but it was decent.
Yo this has legit happened to me while I was making a gaming video for my minecraft channel, this big ‘ol parasite came up and I was like nah bro please don’t but it said YO DUDE. So I pulled out my shotgun and I did a 180 and I quickscoped it, Yo I can’t stop picking up my dogs hot poopers you feel me bro? it’s an everyday grind for me at the moment man. anyway good fucking story dude.
Reasons why I never walk alone at night….anyways excellent pasta!! I wish it was a bit longer though! But it was still good!! 🙂
The thought of being used by a parasite can give anybody nightmares that would probably last for weeks, months, or even years.
It’s a good idea, and the sequence/things included were great, but I think it could’ve used another editing pass and a bit more description.
I think this parasite creature had great potential for a longer story. I would reccomend a part two as an epilogue or even prologue explaining WHY the parasite needs human bodies and skin, what it does when it steals the skin, like it wants to associate with human society from loneliness and that’s why it needs skin, constantly having to change the skin once the body rots, and giving it even a remorseful wretched personality that feels guilt for having to kill and steal the skin off of the humans it craves interaction from? It’s just a concept. Also, the ending could have been tied up so much better because if the narrator was dead, how was he recounting the events? And a more detailed description of the actual death instead of saying “then I died” rather abruptly. This story has a great concept with a lot of potential but it left me wishing there was more content and depth of characters. Keep up the good work though! 3/5
This story did jot make much sense to me.
Could’ve been better, but I like the idea.
This was a good pasta as far as the idea goes but it doesnt make sense that the story is first person and the narrator dies. “It wasn’t long after that, that I was dead. Every muscle, every bone, every organ, every vain and artery was ripped out, and it made its way inside me and stitched up the cut from the inside.” If you read that part, you might get where im coming from.
[spoiler]Narrator dies, but story is written in first person.[/spoiler]
I really enjoyed the gore factor of this pasta, though I do wish it was longer to give more of a description of the “parasite”, and to build up the overall suspense of the story. Great job however, 5/5 from me.
It’s a good basis to a story, I was left wanting much more.
Simple yet got the creep factor across. Nice job.
Yeah….killed him and then took the time to write this drivel. Predictable and clichĂ©d. 1*
The creature was vell described. I
felt sick too. Like if you agree.
I felt like it went a little fast, more just the end. I loved the detail you put into the end, though. Well done.
Reminds me of the movie “Mimic” by Guillermo Del Toro. Very well described and equally terrifying! Amazing job!
and now I’m never walking anywhere ever again
I really enjoyed this quite a bit. Although, I’m already terrified of even just the WORD “parasite,” so I might be a bit biased on that front. I really wish it was a bit longer to better set up a growing sense of suspension and disgust. Well done, this will definitely stay with me for a while. (: